Praise is well, compliment is well, but affection-that is the last and most precious reward that any man can win, whether by character or achievement.

Principles aren't of much account anyway, except at election time. After that you hang them up to let them season.

Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.

Progressive improvement beats delayed perfection.

Prohibition only drives drunkenness behind doors and into dark places, and does not cure it or even diminish it.

Prosperity is the best protector of principle.

Providence protects children and idiots. I know because I have tested it.

Put no trust in the benefits to accrue from early rising, as set forth by the infatuated Franklin.

Quitting smoking is easy, I've done it hundreds of times.

Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.