Never knew before what eternity was made for. It is to give some of us a chance to learn German.

Never let the truth get in the way of a good story .

Never miss an opportunity to shut up.

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do day after tomorrow just as well.

Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer. All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

Never refuse to do a kindness unless the act would work great injury to yourself, and never refuse to take a drink - under any circumstances.

Never tell a lie-except for practice.

Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.

New Orleans food is as delicious as the less criminal forms of sin.

New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions.