Lista de Poemas
[ On his sharing a tiny office in the Metropolitan Opera House studios with Dorothy Parker :] One cubic foot less and it would be adulterous.
[ Suggested epitaph for a movie star :] She sleeps alone at last.
[ Telegram to a friend upon arriving in Venice for a vacation :] STREETS FLOODED. PLEASE ADVISE.
[ Upon withdrawing his savings from a bank that had granted him a loan :] I don’t trust a bank that would lend money to such a poor risk.
A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.
A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.
A great many people have come up to me and asked me how I manage to get so much work done and still keep looking so dissipated.
Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.
As for me, except for an occasional heart attack, I feel as young as I ever did.
Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.
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