Poems List
Explore poems from our collection
Groucho Marx
I sent the club a
I sent the club a wire stating, PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER.
316
Emeasoba George
There is nothing which you
There is nothing which you have presently that's actually an entitlement to you. I mean, your riches/wealth/fame/qualifications/job/career/business/houses/cars/husband/wife/children and what have you? are all end results of God's infinite grace/mercy. So come on, show gratitude to God for his infinite mercy/grace upon your life.
29
Emeasoba George
No one knows how strong
No one knows how strong or weak he is or she is, until he or she faces/endures/overcomes tough times.
18
Jack Handey
Too bad there's not such
Too bad there's not such a thing as a GOLDEN skunk, because you'd probably be PROUD to be sprayed by one.
17
Emeasoba George
Faith is just what it
Faith is just what it takes to keep/hold one's end up i.e. to hold one's stand/belief inspite of predicaments of a lifetime. So, you've got to imbibe & portray faith.
22
Angela Schwindt
While we try to teach
While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about.
80
Saint Francis Xavier
Give me the children until
Give me the children until they are seven and anyone may have them afterward.
69
Emeasoba George
To do oneself justice is
To do oneself justice is just to perform as well as one is able. Take this from me, whoever that does justice to himself/herself/his or her work/career can't and won't be bothered about criticisms no matter the acuteness of the criticism. Anyway, have you been doing justice to yourself/work/career?
23
Emeasoba George
Nothing/nobody loses anything it/he/she has/knows
Nothing/nobody loses anything it/he/she has/knows already just by sharing it with something/someone else. Rather, anything/anyone that shares whatever it/he/she has ends up getting/receiving more of it and never less. Therefore, never hesitate to share whatever you have/know with someone/those that needs/need it.
12
Edward Shepherd Mead
Not even computers will replace
Not even computers will replace committees, because committees buy computers.
39
Jack Handey
It's probably not a good
It's probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you're talking to the president, because what if he tells a funny joke and you laugh so hard you spit the toothpick out and it hits him in the face or something.
49
Emeasoba George
Your mouth/tongue is the end
Your mouth/tongue is the end of discussion as far as your destiny is concerned. For, whatever you dare to speak undoubtedly/convincingly to/for yourself presently is what will surely/subsequently/eventually come to pass. Oh! Yes, if you dare to open up your mouth wide now then, God himself will be moved to fill it up with lots of goodies afterwards (Psalms 81 : 10). Therefore, dare to speak positively and never negatively all-round/at all times.
27
Emeasoba George
You shouldn't be disheartened because
You shouldn't be disheartened because of mistakes/failures. I mean, mistakes/failures shouldn't dishearten you from trying out something new. For, mistake/failure teaches you much more than mastery/walkover does.
33
Howard Scott
Criminal A person with predatory
Criminal A person with predatory instincts who has not sufficient capital to form a corporation.
111
Tom Zegan
If you want to master
If you want to master something then it's best to learn from a Master.
25
Orville Wright
If we all worked on
If we all worked on the assumption that what is accepted as true is really true, there would be little hope of advance.
19
Bette Midler
I never know how much
I never know how much of what I say is true.
162
Rena Kornreich Gelissen
I love, because there is
I love, because there is not enough room in my heart to hate.
57
Otto Frank
‘I am really close to
‘I am really close to tears: I cry very easily. But I want you to know that I am healthy… I try not to worry and I’m sleeping very well. Of course thoughts of Edith and the children never leave me, but I try to look at things more from the positive than the negative side.’
117
Jack Handey
The sound of fresh rain
The sound of fresh rain run-off splashing from the roof reminded me of the sound of urine splashing into a filthy Texaco latrine.
68
Otto Frank
“I still cannot decide whether
“I still cannot decide whether to tell you more comprehensively of some of my experiences – the main thing is that you know I am alive and well. How the thought always torments me, that I have no idea how Edith and the children are, you no doubt understand. I do however hope to see all well again and I do not want to lose hope.’
113
Elias Schwartz
Anything not worth doing is
Anything not worth doing is worth not doing well. Think about it.
35
Steven Wright
When I woke up this
When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.'
27
Otto Frank
One day in Auschwitz I
One day in Auschwitz I became so dispirited that I couldn't carry on. They had given me a beating, which wasn't exactly a pleasant experience. It was on a Sunday, and I said: 'I can't get up'. Then my comrades said: 'That's impossible, you have to get up, otherwise you're lost'. They went to a Dutch doctor, who worked with the German doctor. He came to me in the barracks and said: 'Get up and come to the hospital barracks early tomorrow morning. I'll talk to the German doctor and make sure you are admitted'. Because of that I survived.
166
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